Sexuality Pt. 2

This week we finished up our 'Hey it's February which means Valentine's Day which means let's talk about sex' series. At the end of last week the teens were able to submit questions that would be answered during this week's lesson. We started by examining 1 Corinthians 6:12-20 and using that as our framework from which to answer the questions.

Why does the church not talk about sex?
(Don't you love how perceptive teens are?) It's hard to pinpoint an answer for this question. I think there are multiple reasons. 1. For some reason I think we're afraid that if we talk about sex too much people will just go out and do it. 2. We don't have all the answers and so we just avoid the topic altogether. 3. The generational gap in a large group setting makes it difficult and uncomfortable to discuss sex. Whatever the reason, it's no excuse to skip over an important and God-created thing like sex.

Wouldn't God have known that sex would lead to sin, and as a result make sex not feel good?
It's important to know that everything created before the fall of man was created good. God said so. Sex was one of those things that God created before sin entered the picture. As a result, sex is a good thing when used properly. Why would God make something that's good and then make it so that we'd never want to participate in it? Sex was perfect until sinful man got a hold of it.

How can you say 'No' without being extremely harsh?
My advice is to simply be honest. If someone is pressuring you to do something you don't want to do, be honest but firm in your response. If the other person doesn't understand or doesn't care about your decision, then I wouldn't worry about being too harsh because they aren't worth it anyway

What's wrong with living together before marriage?
To be perfectly honest, there is no 'Thou shalt not live together before marriage' commandment in the Bible. In order to understand God's stance on this topic, we must examine other truths mentioned in the Bible and apply them to this situation. In 1 Corinthians 6:18 we see that we ought to 'run from sexual sin' (NLT). Now, two people can make any excuse they want for living together (save money, get to know one another, spend more time together, etc...) and even be fully determined not to have sex until marriage. However, what they are doing is definitely not running from sexual sin. In fact, it seems to be running towards it! So, while we aren't commanded to not live together before marriage, we are commanded to run from sexual sin and this simply cannot be done when living together.

What does the Bible say about birth control?
I read a book a year or so ago entitled Right Thinking In A World Gone Wrong that did a great job of looking at birth control from a Biblical perspective. You can read my post about that chapter of the book here.

Again, this is a topic not addressed directly in the Bible. In order to reach a conclusion, it is important to separate the two kinds of birth control: those that prevent the fertilization of an egg, and those that kill a living embryo. 'Traditional' birth control, such as the pill and condoms, are meant to prevent an egg from being fertilized. My personal belief, formed from Bible reading, research, and discussion, is that this form of birth control is acceptable. And of course I'm talking about within marriage. Sex should not be taking place outside of marriage anyway, so there's no need to discuss the acceptability of birth control for contraceptive means outside of that context.

The second form of birth control, including the 'morning after pill' and abortion, kills a living embryo. The Bible teaches that murdering a human being is wrong. My firm belief is that an embryo is a living human being from the moment of conception. Size, ability, viability to live outside of a womb, and appearance is not what constitutes humanity. Being a human means that we are created in God's image. I would argue strongly that an embryo is most definitely created in God's image and thus, is a human.

Where should the line be drawn? (or How far is too far?)
Here is my simple response to that question: Imagine that another person is going on a date with your future husband/wife. Imagine the love that you have for your future spouse and how deeply you care about them. Now, what are some things that you wouldn't want the other person to do with your future spouse? Anything that is on that list, you should not be doing with any person you might be on a date with.

And please don't say 'It doesn't bother me that my future spouse is sleeping around or being taken advantage of'. If that's the case, I hope to meet your future spouse first in order to tell them not to waste their time on you. You ought to care so deeply for this person that anytime they are hurt, you hurt. And also, don't forget that the person you are out on a date with could very well be someone else's future spouse. Care for them. Look after them. Respect them. After all...wouldn't you want your future spouse to be treated that way as well?

What about pornography?
Somebody has to say it, so I will...pornography is sinful and wrong. No exceptions. It seems like so often this gets swept under the rug because there are so many more 'worse' things out there (like drugs, STDs, bullying, etc...). I'm not saying those things aren't bad, but I don't think any of those impact our culture today like pornography.

The last couple topics that we've covered aren't mentioned specifically in the Bible. This one, however, is. In fact, Jesus himself addresses pornography. In Matthew 5:27-28 he tell us that even to look at a woman lustfully is to commit adultery. It doesn't get any clearer than that. I don't even feel the need to discuss it any further. I'll simply close with this. There's no better time to break an addiction to pornography than now. It will only get worse. Pray to God for strength. Find people willing to hold you accountable. Voluntarily install an Internet filter on your computer (gasp!). Basically, run from sexual sin.