Healing Through Forgiving

This week we covered a topic that often brings up old memories and a vast array of emotions: Forgiveness.

We opened the night by reading the thoughts of Jesus in Matthew 18:21-35. We see that Jesus makes it very clear to us that we are to forgive others. We also know from experience that this can be a tough venture. Why is that?

It can be tough to forgive because we feel like we are excusing the actions of the other person.
Rest assured...forgiveness does not equal agreement. Just because we forgive someone does not mean that we agree with or condone their actions. What they did was wrong and probably caused us some very real pain. Forgiveness deals with our relationship after the action, not the action itself.

It can be tough to forgive when we have been hurt very deeply.
This one is a no-brainer. Pain and hurt cause us to run away from forgiveness. We'd rather see the other person suffer as we have. We must remember one thing...God has felt pain as well and he wants us to run to him with our pain. Jesus was hurt while on earth, both physically and emotionally. He knows what we are going through. We must take that to him and work through it together. Only then we will be able to forgive the other person.

It is impossible to forgive when we have not experienced forgiveness from God.
How in the world can I forgive someone when I myself have not been forgiven? I have nothing to offer. Only when we let God take away our sins toward him (which are much bigger than anything anyone has ever done to us, by the way) are we able to extend that same forgiveness out to other people.

A great quote by Lewis Smedes sums it up: To forgive is to set the prisoner free...and to discover that the prisoner was you.

So, the question must be asked: Biblically, why forgive?

Here is it: Jesus said so. (Quite the Sunday school answer) When Jesus was asked what the most important commandment was, he answered, "Love God and love others." How can we love others when there is so much anger, rage, and bitterness between us? Forgiveness is not easy, but it is absolutely necessary if we want to live the life Jesus has called us to.